Lights flickering again yesterday, and in a bad way. It stopped a week or so ago, and we just let our concerns go with it. My husband had bought a new fuse box, but not installed it yet. Anyway, I went out back to look at the main electrical line from the pole and it was swinging a bit. Came back in, tried to focus on other things (since, quite frankly, this has terrified me), and the lights began to flicker once more. Went back outside, swinging line again and squirrel glaring at me from the next door neighbor's garage. An aha moment.
Husband called the utility company, they came out last night and found the line connecting to the house had a corroded part and some loose wires.
Such deep relief. Never occurred to us that it was an outside problem.
With this anxiety I've grown accustomed to, the least thing (this wasn't least in my book) makes me so nervous. Even out with the kids today, daughter's car seemed to make a funny noise, I'm thinking flat tire, but it was only the back window, which was open, taking in some air. Windy too, so that was easily explained. Still, it freaked me out. And I'm usually so calm, at least seemingly so on the outside.
When life keeps throwing you curveballs, it's easy to become overly sensitive to the smallest situation.
Reading A Year to Clear by Stephanie Bennett Vogt and she asks in the lesson today a question something like this: What situation gets under your skin, and what can you do to unplug from it? My main driving-me-nuts situation is our oldest son's relationship and living arrangement with his p*rn star girlfriend. It obsesses me and travels in my head all the time. I can't live like this anymore.
So, Advent New Year's resolution is to focus on not focusing on my children. For a mom, this is a major undertaking. Otherwise I'll go flamin' crazy. Not an option.
