I've struggled so hard with the lack of work, or rather the small bit of work that's been in my husband's shop lately. Bills are late being paid, but on we struggle. Yes, food is always in the house---the Lord sees to that, but the work...........that's another matter.
And we continue to wait for a particular deposit to come in, and it's been a month since we were given the go-ahead. Thankfully a smaller job was approved yesterday, with the deposit for that promised in a day or so, but still, it's not enough. I want to be thankful, and hate it when I find myself grousing about not being satisfied.
I was praying this morning, after waking up too early with the dogs. Was frustrated with having to shove them out the door since it was pouring rain, and just felt blue. There was time before anyone else woke up, and I wandered through the living room, turning off outside lights and looking out at the rain. Anyway, I was apologizing to the Lord for my lousy lack of faith, and wanting something to bring me out of my gloom. In an instant, that still voice said to me, "When did you stop believing in Me?"
A shock to hear that. But, you know, it was totally accurate. I get so used to bossing God around, knowing better than He does what we need. Man. Do I need to be put in my place. Directly after I felt ashamed, I prayed for His will in all of this nonsense. And took my hands off of that job which is being so delayed in responding.
Another phone call came this afternoon with a great possibility of being accepted. Something totally out of the blue. Now, we have two potential build jobs in the works. Forget the overdue deposit.
I need to start believing. All. The. Time.
And we continue to wait for a particular deposit to come in, and it's been a month since we were given the go-ahead. Thankfully a smaller job was approved yesterday, with the deposit for that promised in a day or so, but still, it's not enough. I want to be thankful, and hate it when I find myself grousing about not being satisfied.
I was praying this morning, after waking up too early with the dogs. Was frustrated with having to shove them out the door since it was pouring rain, and just felt blue. There was time before anyone else woke up, and I wandered through the living room, turning off outside lights and looking out at the rain. Anyway, I was apologizing to the Lord for my lousy lack of faith, and wanting something to bring me out of my gloom. In an instant, that still voice said to me, "When did you stop believing in Me?"
A shock to hear that. But, you know, it was totally accurate. I get so used to bossing God around, knowing better than He does what we need. Man. Do I need to be put in my place. Directly after I felt ashamed, I prayed for His will in all of this nonsense. And took my hands off of that job which is being so delayed in responding.
Another phone call came this afternoon with a great possibility of being accepted. Something totally out of the blue. Now, we have two potential build jobs in the works. Forget the overdue deposit.
I need to start believing. All. The. Time.
