Feeling mentally 'out of touch' (if that makes any sense) and I'm not sure how to cure it. Yesterday, I told our oldest daughter that I just felt----well, 'out of touch with the house' was how I put it. Seems I keep getting either sidetracked or ambushed or something like that. There are things I want to do around here, before we start back with school, and the interruptions are driving me nuts.
One darned interruption is fatigue. My heart is willing but my body is weak---you get the drift. I had plans to do stuff after we got home from the grocery store yesterday, but it was so hot outside that my plans just fell by the wayside. Maybe it's the reality of my body finally showing the wear and tear of having so many children. Do you think? If I were of a more practical mindset, maybe that would be where my head wanders. Or maybe I am practical and in denial at the same time. Denial makes pretty good sense just now.
What I really want (I think) is to have some time to just settle in for a day. As it is, the kids and I will go do our volunteer cleaning stint at the church this morning. I don't have a problem with that 90 minute stretch of time, but what's funny is that after we get home we just sit. Another woman there commented on how she doesn't do any housework after cleaning at the church, since she's already given it her all. I get that. Ninety minutes of consistent labor will tax a person's abilities. Plus, as I said, it's HOT.
Tomorrow I have plans to take the kids to a local museum since we have free passes that expire on the 25th. Best do it, hmm? And on Thursday, they go spend time at my mom's. Most of them. I want to stay home, cancel all plans and say nuts to the world. Somebody give me permission, will ya? I seem to need it.
I realize I'm just rattled. Needing alone time and a stretch of minutes without the bother of being asked questions. I know what the problem is. Summer doesn't hold the connotation for me of what the world talks about. It's more of the same, only without schoolwork messing up the works.
And, no, not wanting any cheese. This isn't a whine so much as a bite of reality.
One darned interruption is fatigue. My heart is willing but my body is weak---you get the drift. I had plans to do stuff after we got home from the grocery store yesterday, but it was so hot outside that my plans just fell by the wayside. Maybe it's the reality of my body finally showing the wear and tear of having so many children. Do you think? If I were of a more practical mindset, maybe that would be where my head wanders. Or maybe I am practical and in denial at the same time. Denial makes pretty good sense just now.
What I really want (I think) is to have some time to just settle in for a day. As it is, the kids and I will go do our volunteer cleaning stint at the church this morning. I don't have a problem with that 90 minute stretch of time, but what's funny is that after we get home we just sit. Another woman there commented on how she doesn't do any housework after cleaning at the church, since she's already given it her all. I get that. Ninety minutes of consistent labor will tax a person's abilities. Plus, as I said, it's HOT.
Tomorrow I have plans to take the kids to a local museum since we have free passes that expire on the 25th. Best do it, hmm? And on Thursday, they go spend time at my mom's. Most of them. I want to stay home, cancel all plans and say nuts to the world. Somebody give me permission, will ya? I seem to need it.
I realize I'm just rattled. Needing alone time and a stretch of minutes without the bother of being asked questions. I know what the problem is. Summer doesn't hold the connotation for me of what the world talks about. It's more of the same, only without schoolwork messing up the works.
And, no, not wanting any cheese. This isn't a whine so much as a bite of reality.
