Used to, Mondays were my favorite day of the week. Now, not so much. The pressure begins again, and the responsibilities with schoolwork and tending to the dailies slaps me in the face. I think I'm in a rut.
Get prepared...here comes the whine.
Have gotten un-used-to being thankful. And have allowed myself to wallow a bit in self-pity, though I really have no honest excuse for that. The kids are great and my husband is wonderful as well. I think I'm just exhausted. My sleep is interrupted almost every morning *too* early, and I feel like a slug. The sparkle is missing, and that frustrates me. I want my twinkle back.
Little by little, I want to bring something----not sure what, into my days that causes me to sit up a bit straighter. Just little happies. Honestly, with all of these kids, it's easy to become overwhelmed. Sadly, the things you read by women with lots of kids tends to lean toward how well-organized they are and how jolly their households are. I think those women are lying.
Plus, it's easy to get into a mindset of feeling unappreciated. I was mumbling to myself the other night (within hearing distance of a couple of my housemates) and said that I worked so hard at getting as much squeezed out every penny as possible, and that nobody seemed to notice. The gratitude seems to be missing. My husband teased me back, trying to lighten the mood, when actually I wanted a pat on the back. He's tired too. He's working hard, getting little appreciation in the way of clients, and is a tad frustrated as well.
Funny how what we need and what we get aren't always the same thing. Well, it'd be unrealistic for things to fall into place that easily, wouldn't it? And while it'd be nice to get human pats-on-the-back more often, I need to be satisfied when that doesn't happen, I guess.
Patting myself on the back (and trying to think of something to lighten my husband's mood).
