Wednesday's news

A busy day yesterday but all of it good. Took two of the boys for eye exams, and one son (who's 15) turned out to have perfect vision (certainly takes after his dad at that age), and our youngest son (who's 13) had to get glasses. He'd been having headaches for awhile, but just lately told us about things in a distance looking blurry. He's just full of himself now! He definitely needed some help. So thankful we had the money to do this, because doctor stuff is always expensive. I was grateful for the boys' manners too. The eyeglasses tech. said she didn't see children as polite as ours much anymore, and as for hearing yes ma'am and no ma'am, she said hardly any kids said that anymore. A shame. In the South, that used to be the rule and not the exception. Praise for my children transfers as praise to me, and we all need that boost from time to time. Must remember that.

Also shopped for another son, who's turning 18 today. We don't have to go anywhere , so we can bake a homemade scratch carrot cake (husband fixed oven on Monday), and chicken enchiladas. We'd been suffering (unsatisfied yearnings) due to not having the oven working, so are thrilled to be baking again. :)

As to the neighbor issue---I've put distance between us, not answering her calls unless she leaves a voice message. Interesting how much calmer I feel without her stress piled on top of mine. It was making me a different person...so odd.

The rest of the week looks busy too, but it's all good. My husband has a couple of bids out for work---folks are calling and he's content because things are moving along. A quiet shop is disturbing for him, but folks are still out there spending money. Regardless of what the papers say, God is still in control and looking out for His people. I take great comfort in that.

This and that

Drinking the last sips of my Darjeeling. Fans spinning, since we're not anxious to turn on the air conditioning just yet. Paid the bills for now...yes! Planning on taking it a bit easier today. After I call the insurance company when they open this morning, oldest daughter will go to the grocery for a few things and then we'll head out to the library. On the way, will pick up the part for my stove. My baker son has been in withdrawal mode with the oven not working.

That's pretty much it for me today. No big stresses, just a bit curious about what the insurance company might say. No matter, we'll have the bathroom torn into on Saturday, with the boys and Gary being instructed on what to do by the friend of a neighbor. He knows what's up.

Oldest daughter looked at me in all sincerity last night and asked if I could PLEASE take some time off. She said it's good for them (the kids) to see me taking care of myself. Honestly, I'm not aware of what a homestyle work-a-holic I've become. Must amend that behavior, but realize it will take some time and personal adjustment to turn away from busyness.

Off to stir up children. Take care.

Btw, still crocheting. Must put up photos. :)

Update on rant

For your prayers and encouragement, thanks. Now let me tell you about God's sense of humor. I'd gotten up early-early this morning, and went back to bed when the rest of the house began moving about---at around 8:30am. I turned off my cell phone and nodded off. When I woke up later on, turned it back on and there was a voice message from my neighbor. Turns out she lost the paperwork regarding her doctor's visit for tomorrow and said I'd not have to babysit.

I just laughed. Like last week, when I hesitated about helping her, she went ahead and made different plans, and God provided a day out for the kids and me---kite flying. Tomorrow we'll go to the library.

He loves me, but I don't always get how much, nor do I understand the gentleness He wants to show me. This sort of circumstance is bringing that home. Must be I need to learn this.

Again, thanks.

Rant

Wanting to get a grip on my life this week. The pastor talked about worry and control last night, and one quote went something like this: "Worry is a fear of not having control." Bingo. Seems one plays off the other.

My husband told me yesterday that I was wound up tighter than Dick's hatband, and he's right. I'm so uptight and frazzled, I'm not even aware of it. It's become a way of life. I remember that my needy neighbor asked me to babysit tomorrow morning while she goes to the doctor for some tests and I want to call her up and cancel, but of course I won't. I agreed a couple of weeks ago, but really need (for my own sanity) to get a grip on her requests and my ability to solve them. There was a bit of a reprieve last week (and the prayers and advice from a couple of friends was priceless), but every darn time she rings my cell phone, there's a want/need/question. She's not going away! Obviously I'm not dealing with it very well. Partly it's the thread of exaggeration in her behavior. She called last week about a rash her baby had, and her own mom (who is also prone to making mountains out of molehills) thought it was ringw*rm or impet*go. I got online to see what impet*go looked like, so I'd be prepared before I walked over there. (drumroll, please) It was a heatrash. Just that. And this happens all the time. Hear me? All the time. Everything is a big deal with this chick.

There's the issue of wanting to be a good witness, but there's way too much taking on her part and the playing field isn't very level. A WWJD moment for sure. But if my memory serves me right, even the Lord grew weary of folks....'course He didn't follow through on the sinful thoughts concerning said individuals, but still...the takers of the world sure can drain a person.

But today is good, so far. And while I rarely get enough sleep, it's amazing how a person can function with as little as I get. Still, the mood falters and depression peeks its ugly head at me from time to time. Will try to boost up myself today. Have to call the insurance company tomorrow to see if they'll pay for our bathroom floor repair. Don't have a clue, but we figure it's worth a try. My mom's optimistic about it for us. And I want some time to get my thoughts together about that neighbor. I know that their house needs the Lord, yet just struggle with how much I'm necessary to them. But honestly, if it's not me, someone else will come along and fill the void. I'm physically drained from the situation, and have some work to do before I'll be settled about it. Sort of weird how it's obsessing me so much. I do think too much, hence the hatband comment. Just makes me wonder how my zingy-ness shows up in my personality. Must go chill, don't you think? Oldest daughter bought donuts yesterday for our morning breakfast today. Time for one. :) This'll work out. I just need to let go of it, and not try to fix it. The letting go is the hard part, though. Always.

Fussing

Have felt a bit zingy today. A bit stirred up because we're going to have to have our bathroom worked on---meaning the floor will need to be torn out completely, reworked from under the house (we have a crawlspace), and then re-tiled. It's gotten to the place where the floor is beginning to list to the west, like if you played a game of marbles in there (keeping in mind that it's really tiny), that the balls would end up against the wall. Not good. Gary recommends that the kids not hop in the bathroom, plus I get a bit worried when anyone takes a bath. He says it's not that bad, but still.

Can't stand having to use money for repairs that you can't see. Makes me all upset to have the house torn up, even for a day (a friend says he, Gary and the boys can get it done in one LONG day). Ugh.

Would rather eat nails.

I like life to be all nice and quiet. Don't stir me up and let's just do the regular stuff. Maybe I get rankled because my dad was a home remodeler, and I remember lots of times when he'd be doing stuff in the house. The end results were always peachy, but the process was noisy and messy. Not that I'm a neat-freak, anything but...yet I do like my routines. And, yes, I realize I'll be glad to have the floor all safe, but can't help but be a bit wired about it.

Must go find that bag of nails.

Late Thursday afternoon

Getting the house in order. About to dust, then vacuum up dog hair---the tumbleweeds the big dogs make are amazing, rolling in corners, under furniture, annoying as all get-out! Then will run around and put away stray things, get the sheets off the line (where they've been hanging out in 80 degree heat...lovely), hurriedly make the bed back up (we only have single sets of sheets on each bed) look in a mirror and make personal adjustments to as to not scare my husband when he comes some, then to mix up a batch of flour tortillas, a first since we usually buy them at the grocery. Also to put together the black beans and rice that's for dinner too.

Then to rest after dinner. I think I can do that. :)

Flowers :)

The flowers given to me by one of my favorite hippie neighbors. :) The colors are true too---as brilliant as they show up here. Just wish this screen was scratch and sniff. The roses are a treat!

It's a fact that I'm flower crazy. Just a look around the house and you'd see that I'm unable to buy fabric but it's got flowers on it. Can't have too much, you know. And yes, that's a sequined wand in the right-hand corner of the rose picture. A necessity.

Deep breaths

It follows that after a day that was clearly blessed, the idea is that you get your fill of joy and allow it to sort of spill over into the next day. That's today. Lots to do...piddly stuff, but still, it's there.

One son has yards to do with a brother so needs gas, bags, etc. I'm the chauffeur for the job. No biggie. Another son wants to go to the bank to turn in some rolled pennies for *real* money. I need to figure out bread for dinner (potato soup---oh joy of joys---read heavy sarcasm here!) since the oven is still not working. Might get yeast and oil to make China Buns (what we call English Muffins) since they cook on top of the stove, and are truly delish.

Neighbor with sprained ankle might call on me to help her a bit. Am trying the tough love angle, encouraging her to see that she's more able than she's wanting to admit. Not easy when faced with the reality that she's not very self-confident. And I tend to not be an enabler, so when folks beg for help, I'm often pretty tough. I'll help, but only after I see that there's no other option. I have a servant's heart but really squirm when I see that the person in question is able to do more than they think they can. Sometimes I feel my hands are tied---like me helping isn't really helping if you know what I mean. A puzzle, to be sure.

But, if I look at the day overall, it's all do-able. Nothing overwhelming, but plain living. Doing school, cleaning the house, reading at naptime, getting the house straight for my husband coming home, watering seedlings. All mine and all good. Puts it all in perspective, doesn't it? :)

A wonderful Monday

I've always been a believer in things happening by threes. My mother drummed this into me, making me watch and wait when something bad happened----it followed that 2 more things would occur. I find myself continuing the same tradition (superstition). But today I counted four, and it wasn't bad things, but neat stuff.

• A sticky situation was handled by the Lord alone and worked out beautifully.
• The kids and I went to fly kites and saw buffalo (same location).
• A neighbor brought over some purple iris and roses she'd grown (photos to follow later on).
• And a sweet online friend sent me a pretty little Moleskine notebook she'd decorated.

The mail bringing the notebook was the icing on the cake that was already a great day. God seemed to set this one aside for me, and considering I woke up all angsty about an issue, well, I feel hugely blessed. I forget that He wants my joy too.

Btw, the buffalo are at a park about 10 minutes from our house. Aren't they the coolest? We were able to get pretty close to them, about 10 ft. or so. What a rush. :)

(photos by oldest daughter)

Anne Lamott

Having a personal revelation time here. Just finished reading Anne Lamott's book Blue Shoe, and while I really enjoyed it, am mildly shocked at how much swearing goes on in it. Lots. But, at the same time, there were things in it that rang so true in regards to God's grace. It caused me to remember that all Christians aren't squeaky clean, and that my personal belief system is oftentimes unrealistic. I can easily be judgmental, putting folks in boxes.

For the longest time, I've believed that when a person accepts Christ, that they undergo a metamorphosis so that we're more alike---me and them. Arrogant, huh? To me (well, up until this weekend), I've thought that believers would give up bad habits, clean up their language and be legalistic (that would be me). I've got legalism nailed down tight. It feels good to be better than anyone else, you know?!??! The truth is, though, that some folks, while they have a heart change, remain the same in many ways, and that doesn't always include squeaky-clean-ness.

It was like a breath of fresh air to read this book. Profanity aside, that is. :) One of my brothers asked me awhile back if I read Lamott, and I self-righteously made a comment about her language. He laughed. He knew already what I'm just learning.

Folks are sinful, period. Yeah, me too. But I've made myself comfortable thinking that, well, I don't swear or cheat on my husband, or steal, etc. But my problem has involved me being more of a Pharisee that I need to be. To set myself and other Christians up on pedestals is just pathetic. Here's a neat quote in the book:

"I'll tell you what's most amazing to me," the pastor said. "That Jesus comes to people like us. Cowards, liars---even mother-mockers! And entrusts us with the Kingdom of God, with carrying a message of peace. We get that peace too, when we surrender to the horrible belief that God loves us anyway."

Isn't that just cool? Besides, I've always loved the stories about David in the Bible. My goodness. Talk about someone who continued to mess up, and still, God showed such love by including David in Jesus' lineage. Amazing love, that's what that is. He knows we'll mess up all the time, and still, we're of use to Him.

Movies

Gary and I saw the best movie last night....Will Smith's Seven Pounds. I can't remember when I've enjoyed a movie more. Well, those Masterpiece goodies rate high (Cranford at the top of the list), but for a movie-movie, this was super. Spent a good part of it nudging my husband, asking if he 'got' it. There was so much going on, and while it could've been confusing, it all melded together nicely. Very enthralling.

Nice to escape into a good film. Doesn't happen often, but when it does, it's memorable.

A peaceful day

My days are so routine, but in a comforting way. Today included. The least one has a birthday on Sunday, and turns seven. She had high hopes about what sort of cake we'd bake, but with the stove still out---we'll buy a pretty bakery cake at the grocery instead. Lovely. And she wants Little Caesar's pizza. Double yay. Now, if one of the kids will wrap her presents (yet to be bought except for a dishy Barbie MP3 player I have tucked in the closet), then my work is DONE!

About to finish up making the Beef Stroganoff for dinner. Noodles to cook, frozen corn to be thawed in a pan, plain old sandwich bread on the side. Sounds easy and yummy.

Tomorrow is grocery day. Might have company (friends of the kids') for dinner on Saturday. Again, easy to deal with. The house has stayed decent, so I'm game for just about anything. This habit I have to putting the house to rights before bed sure does pay off. I get up early with the dogs in the morning, and feel at ease because everything's picked up. For those of you who are always neat and tidy, believe me, this hasn't been the norm. at this house. For years, I left dishes in the sink and odds and ends piled up hither and yon. This is MUCH better. Settles my nerves (which tend to be wound up), and gives me calm. If I do anything right, this has to be near the top of the list.

Now off to tidy up myself and finish up those dinner plans.

(another photo of the shelf over the kitchen sink---the lace curtain is from an old tablecloth of my mom's---they say I have a girlie house---what's up with that?!!)

Tea Party Day

Woodboy went to the TeaParty here today. Good crowd, traffic backed up, hard to find parking, so oldest daughter let him off as they paused on the way home from work. Glad one of us was able to go. By the time I drove by (had all the kids with me, so couldn't easily stop), the corner was packed. Lots of folks, homemade signs, speeches, good stuff. I went back later to pick him up. What a rush!

I'm proud to be an American, especially a rebellious one. :)

On my Wednesday

Going to take it a bit easy today. The kids will be at my mom's for part of the day, I'll attempt to go to the library, and I need to get something for dinner at the grocery. It's been a challenge to make do with the oven being on the blink. Last night, two of the kids used some blueberries that were given to us (in the Easter basket I already told you about) and made fried pies in one of our iron skillets. Used what we had in terms of other ingredients and were they good. Delish. Reminded me of the peach fried pies my grandmother use to make. Will definitely nudge them to make these again. :) A bit labor-intensive, but not so much as homemade donuts.

Just want time to have quiet today. Will get some lunch to have by myself. Note the words....by myself. Looking forward to some alone time, a good book and a nap. Another night of 5-1/2 hours sleep. I feel surprisingly chipper, but by 1pm or so, that'll change. Must take care of myself, you know. Off to do stuff now.

Sweet husband

That's what I'm talking about...

TeaParty Day

It's tomorrow. (link is clickable to main site)

Must watch :)

Monday's thoughts

It's noisy here. Already. Not sure I'm mentally equipped for the kids today, and would prefer to extend the weekend mentality over for one more day. They keep walking up to me and telling me stuff. I love 'em, but am obviously a llittle testy. And a bit rattled at getting a mere 5-1/2 hours sleep. Not uncommon, but that's not to say that I'm used to it!

Here's the deal, and what's on my mind. We're really good at keeping to a homeschool schedule. We're not as rigid as some folks, but it works for us. I'm not a tyrant about it, but feeling organized about some things makes the days go smoother, and I feel less guilty as a result. But---I do have a hard time rationalizing the taking of days off, or even shortening school days just because I want to. What I forget is that teaching these kids, and being with them 24 hours a day is exhausting. I am teaching 5 of the eight, and isn't that expecting plenty of myself as it is? It's not like they'll turn into idiots in a day's time, is it? But, at the same time, I tend to overlook my personal needs, driving myself to death and overextending. What's up with that?

So, this morning we'll get our week's schedule all settled, and then will take a drive. A nice, long drive. Now doesn't that sound good? Otherwise, I'll not be rejoicing in the day, but will be angsty about it. And that won't do, just won't do at all.

I can be so hard on myself. The thing is, the kids don't need to see me do that, and I owe myself a break from time to time. Yeah. Still, when I read over this post, I see that it appears that I'm asking for permission from you guys. I amaze myself. Truly.

Joyous Easter

Am up before the house, as usual, and have browsed the sites I enjoy online. I'm still amazed at God's provision, even for the simple things. Read on.

Case in point....our oven went on the blink Thursday night, after we got home from church (I know what the problem is---the igniter, and Gary's already replaced it once before), so that put a kink in what we would've planned for Easter dinner. My only real regret was not being able to make Hot Cross Buns. Not sure why that was on my mind so, but I was really looking forward to that. Oh well. So, we re-did the grocery list and I just figured we'd fret about the oven fix after the holiday weekend. Mind you, Gary was game to go ahead and do it, but it was one more thing and I don't always enjoy the 'one-more-thing' mentality. Makes the list grow.

Anyway, here's where the story gets neat....two of the boys had a yard to clean/cut yesterday morning, for a friend of a friend. She's a really sweet person, and I've talked to her several times, but we've not had the opportunity to get close. Add to that, Gary took the boys to do the job (loaded mowers, etc.) and came back to pick them up. Busyness! I'd already taken everyone else to the art gallery for the morning, and we stopped by this friend's house afterwards, on our way home (her house is so cute, I wanted to see it all tidy!). They were all outside when we got there, and Gary was on his way. This generous woman----get this---had packed a beautiful basket with a honey-baked ham, bakery chocolate cake, cheesecake, bread, a begonia, a wrapped candle, some candy, plastic eggs, and some hot cross buns from the store.

Is that not the coolest story?

I love it when God answers a prayer or need even unexpectedly. Just wanted to share. :)

Good Friday

Putting the finishing touches to the taxes, cleaning the oven (so icky) and making different plans for Easter dinner 'cause the whatsit is broken on the oven since last night. Need new igniter gadget. We bake so much, this will be the second one. Yeah, they don't make things like they used to, and this oven is only about 7 years old, I think. Thankfully, husband is handy with repairs like this.

No school for today. Sigh...wonderful.

Just doing the basics and a grocery store run later.

Maundy Thursday

Going to services tonight....communion, music and sweetness. Looking forward to it. I'm really going to try and focus on the weekend, and remember what it's all about. Not always easy with the commercial end of Easter smacking us in the face. I love eggs and bunnies as much as the next guy, but there comes a time when true Easter has to be recognized. And that's now.

Huh!

Have been trying to muzzle myself, but after seeing the video clip of the President bowing to the Saudi King, I have to say something. OK, it's not a huge deal to me that he actually did bow. He should have known better. What gets me is that the White House denies that he bowed. After folks have seen the footage, they have the gall to say that?!???!

Well, to give the President a tiny bit of credit, my husband said that when Bush was President, he inappropriately kissed another leader. Fine. But I'm not sure that they lied about it.

Reminds me of the Clinton years, when something would happen and Bill would blatantly lie about it. I got used to rubbing my eyes, wondering if I was seeing things clearly. Well, yeah. It's not in the interpretation. Shoot, if the President flubbed up, just admit it and go from there. I'll feel much better about the guy if you do that. (Ok, I exaggerate. Can't say as I'll ever feel better about the current President. The US is on a downward spiral in the toilet, if you ask me.) But to say it didn't happen doesn't help one bit. We're not idiots out here. Besides, the Saudis are pleased about the bow. Of course they are. I would be too. But be honest. That's all I'm asking.

Off to crank up the Backstreet Boys CD in my headphones. That'll cheer me. :)

About folks rushing about...

Home seems to be the best place, by far. Was out earlier, and am glad to be sitting here again.

I'm constantly plagued by tail-gaters (like you, Diane!) when I get out in the truck, and the rushing mentality wears thin. I was behind an elderly lady at Michael's today, she paid with a check, and I remember how common that was even a short while ago. Now, everyone uses debit cards, or charges their purchases. Cash is probably used somewhere in the middle. But anyway, as I waited (I wasn't in a hurry) I was reminded of how we used to be more patient. We weren't always tapping our feet. This woman didn't have her purse open until the goods were rung up and she had to find her pen and write out the check. No hurries, and you know, it was almost refreshing. Thankfully the checker was sweet, because it's so maddening to see cashiers get impatient with customers, especially older ones, who still do the things the old-fashioned way. I mean, how important ARE we that we have to blast our way through the simplest of exchanges?

Not sure what happened, but maybe the Internet/get-it-quick mindset has overtaken us. We get our treasures that are bought online in days, rather than weeks. We email folks and expect to hear back from them immediately, and the list goes on and on. I have even gotten out of the practice of sending hand-written letters and cards, because it takes time to select the proper notecard, and I can't seem to make myself sit still long enough to fill up the pages. Plus, email is free. How sad is that? I'm guilty too, and I hate that about myself. This rushing around stuff is contagious.

It's just pathetic.

Lately, I've been learning to crochet, and partly it's so I'll just slow down. And while I'm not ever guilty of tail-gating, I am sorely bad at rushing through tasks at home, rarely enjoying them, but trying simply get to the next thing. The thing is, hurrying doesn't get the job done any better, and I end up frustrated at time spent so thinly.

My solution is the one-task-at-a-time method. Do each thing until it's done and repeat. I'm even trying to train the kids to not interrupt me while I'm, like, loading the washer, pushing the vacuum, etc., so they know that even a mundane job is important. And I feel more productive and appreciative of my own time when I respect myself while doing it. If they see me finishing, they'll value the job more, I think. Right?

Off my soapbox now. :)

Blessings

One of those small jobs came in for my husband yesterday. God's timing always surprises me, and I should be used to the "at the last minute" quality of how He works. :) Gary left early so he could get the work completed today. Tiny victories, and proof that the Lord does answer prayer. Truly, if anyone on the outside, looking in, could see our finances and weighed them against the world and its problems now, they'd just shake their head. It's amazing how the Lord continues to bring work into my husband's shop. And, while I don't know how we'd manage without the kids' help from time to time, still the bulk of the bills are paid through the workshop.

Am reminded of the verse in James 4:2, about us not having because we don't ask God for it. We'll go to any extreme to make things happen, when resting in the Lord and asking for His help is all that's needed. Something for me to remember when I get to biting my nails. Sometimes I seem to want Him to just read my mind, and pop out the answers. But I tend to forget that He wants a relationship with me aside from responding to my needs.

Yes, I continue to have to learn the hard way.

My day

• Just spent about 1/2 an hour doing some deep-breathing yoga exercises
• Chillin' afterwards, 'cause I don't want to mess up the moment ;)
• Need to get onto loading the tax figures online again, but don't want to stress
• Even with all the numbers in front of me, and expecting few surprises, doing the taxes is high blood pressure inducing
  
• Husband needing work in the shop, but has a couple of bids out
• Thankful for oldest son buying groceries today
• Focusing on NOW and my own home, and not the world at large
• About to putter around the house, tidying up loose ends
• Spaghetti in the crock pot, making the kitchen smell dishy
• Might whip together a 1/2 batch of the bread I mentioned the other day
• We've already made it twice
• Kids might make peanut butter cookies too, I'm craving them
  
• Hard to live one-day-at-a-time, but finding it necessary
• Trusting the Lord seems to be a challenge, but rewarding when I practice it
• Off to get the house in order now...
  

A fresh day...

Finding that crochet work is addictive. Really. I found a scarf pattern in the Crocheting for Dummies book, and have used up one skein already. A first for me. The directions in the book work really well alongside the YouTube videos. So cool to teach yourself how to do stuff and not spend a penny. Well, yarn isn't expensive and it's so rewarding to make something so quickly.

A cold day. Snow us just to the North and East of us, but supposedly won't make it here. Just windy and cold. The clothes will dry quickly on the clotheslines though. :) Glad I have my minions to do that for me!

Not sure what the plan is today. Oldest daughter left me with a thought before we went to bed last night, asking what she could do for me today. One thing, she says. Tell me one thing I can do for you. Huh! Like, this girl is always giving. She's bought us groceries (many times), made dinner, given me little gifts just because, tidied up the house---it's like I could say in return that what has she NOT done for me lately? She's a keeper. But not sure I have an answer for her.

Hoping I can just flow with the day, and not take on any worries. My husband needs work in the shop, but we have a sort of lull at the beginning of the months. No bills are due, so no immediate pressures, but just praying for grocery money. I seriously need to practice some yoga again (just the physically relaxing parts)....to be still and focus on my breathing can be so totally relaxing. I'm usually flying every which-a-way, so pure quiet is a blessing. Seems I tend to be tense, waiting for the next interruption. But that's the way with moms, isn't it?

Must go and put the first load in the washer. Have already been up since 6:30am, am finishing up my tea, crocheted earlier, and now it's time to stir the house awake. Husband is gone to work, so here we are with a fresh, new Monday. Need to keep my focus on the Lord and what He wants for me. Again, rejoice and be glad in it, yes?

On my Sunday

The window's open behind my back, just a couple of inches, and the wind is blowing the white curtain prettily. Best enjoy it. The cold is on the way in and it's supposed to get down to freezing tomorrow night. Our last freeze date is around the 20th or 21st, and we always get a blast just before that. Glad I've resisted putting out seed, esp. with it being so wonderfully warm lately.

Enjoyed going to church with oldest daughter this morning. We tend to go on Saturday nights, but yesterday some of the older ones went to fly kites and got back too late to get ready. That was fine. The weekends can get busy fast, and it's nice to be lazy instead.

But this morning, she and I went to services at 9:30am---just the two of us---and that was just plain nice. 'Course we regularly visit a mega church, so it pays to be clever about when to get there, so parking isn't the adventure it might be otherwise. I'd only gotten 5 hours of sleep, so after coming home, I took a nap---a four hour one!---and feel much more human now. Well sort of. You know how it is when you sleep too long during the day and your body gets all weird on you? Well, that's the way it was when I got up at 4pm. I don't know how I do it. Not that I'd recommend my sleep routine to anyone. Must be my body is used to a sloppy sleep pattern. Fact is, I run on empty most times, even with a regular night's sleep. At a loss of how to fix it, but with this busy and full household, guess it's just the way it is.

Not sure what the week holds. I've not bought any Easter stuff, and need to attend to that earlier rather than later. Time's gotten away from me. It does that, you know. Must get the taxes loaded into H&R Block online. Husband gave me figures and I'm the one who fills out the stuff. Hope I'll be pleasantly surprise.

Just re-read this post and think I sound a bit draggy. I think I need something out-of-the-ordinary to perk me up, yes? Life has been a bit routine. Well, there's the neighborhood association meeting tomorrow night. Not exciting, but it's with people other than the ones I live with. Sometimes that's all it takes. :)

Baking bread

Made the best bread yesterday---better than any I've ever whipped up. And I've made some bread. :) One son (the one who enjoys baking) got to hunting on the Internet for a bread that would wind up like a big wad. I wanted a pile of bread. And while I know that this description doesn't sound too appetizing, the bread ended up being DEElishus! We had two loaves on the largest of our cookie sheets, and all agreed that it was the best ever. My husband even asked how much better cost-wise it was to make this bread rather than buying sliced loaves at the grocery. The highest of compliments. The only changes I made in the recipe were to use brown sugar in place of the turbinado they used, and I also mixed in margarine instead of oil, just because we were out of the oil. And from the reviews the bread has gotten at the site, substitutions wear well with it. Wonderful all around.

Without further ado, the link is here!

(this photo is from the recipe site, and our two loaves looked, pretty much, like this...flatter than loaf bread, and a bit spread out)

What's winging around in my head

• foolishly answered my cellphone this morning to an unknown number--was a man attempting an obsc*ne phonecall, but must have been new at it. i even said "i beg your pardon?" causing him to repeat the nonsense. wish i'd been better at a retort. it was pitiful, plus his voice reminded me of what alfred e. neuman's would sound like. brother.
  
• thinking the men at the super-duper Summit looked a bit unimpressive in their photos...speaking of Mad Magazine. :)
  
• our country is being led by ignoramuses, I fear (and apparently, we're not alone in that).
• haven't done as well with my news fast as I hoped--very difficult--must try again like with any addiction.
  
• about to dust, run the vacuum and whip parts of the house quickly into shape.
• then some quiet in bed with books.
  
• must get up by 3:30pm, 'cause if i do that, we get to have yeast bread with dinner---I have the timing down to a science.
• a quiet weekend ahead, I hope.
• plan on handing out a few neighborhood assoc. fliers before monday.
• enjoying the sun coming in the windows.
• tickled at robins building nest in carolina jessamine on front porch.
• needing to buy a frugal mess of groceries for the weekend.
• having to constantly keep mind in calm mode--escape into a book necessary, and needing to be applied ASAP.
• must go, time's awasting
  

Friday morning

Daisy the Pug was up just before 6am this morning, and trotted down the steps to our bedroom. Her new routine. So Gary didn't wake up, I quietly got out of bed, being rewarded by her licking my legs. And, while I didn't get enough sleep (which tends to be the norm), getting to sleep at 1am, I was feeling pretty refreshed anyhow. Melatonin is my friend. I sleep hard when I take that, and it makes all the difference. Good stuff.

Anyhow, so glad I continue to tidy the house before going to bed. I'm getting downright compulsive about it. But still, there are series of days sometimes when the housekeeping goes down the drain. I'll leave dishes in the sink, the piles will grow on the flat surfaces and the dust will accumulate. Hate it when that happens, but am always so pleased when it gets back to neat and tidy. Settles my mind. Truly, when the house is dirty, my head gets messed up. When it's straight, I feel content. I'm easy.

So, today is a home day. There's enough food in the house for dinner. Meals are unimaginative, lately, by necessity, but fine nonetheless. That potato soup is finally for tonight's dinner, and I'm glad I have some sour cream to put in it. I mentioned making bread yesterday, but will do that today. Was so preoccupied with the weather yesterday, hearing talk about tornadoes and the like, that I felt a tiny bit rattled. Just rain. There was no need to feel unsettled, as it turns out.

Today will be sunny. Can finally hang out clothes again. Domestic chores are so appealing sometimes. And while a good nap will be necessary later, I'm going to enjoy the morning as it comes.

MLK

This time last year, I got our mail lady's attention while my husband and I were on the front porch and asked her if she was getting off for Martin Luther King Day. I said I remembered in the past that our city had two holidays for MLK. I was wondering if we still did. I just couldn't remember. She gave me a startled look, and I said that I figured she'd know. My meaning was that she'd know because she delivered the mail and would know beforehand if she'd be working. She got offended and said she didn't know what I was talking about. Me? I was clueless that I'd set her on edge.

After she walked away, my husband said he couldn't believe that I'd asked her that. I was still clueless. He said that she probably was offended because I was asking her about MLK Day because she was black. Like she was supposed to know all the black trivia?!?? That hadn't even entered my mind. I was wondering if the mail would run.

I ran her down and apologized, and told her that as far as I knew, there was a second holiday here in honor of MLK. She shrugged and said that she wasn't aware of it.

We live in Memphis. Tomorrow, the third of April, is MLK Memorial Day here---paying tribute to the day he died on April 4th. The libraries are closed, the trash won't be collected, and I believe the City offices will be shut down. Even the public schools are closed.

The thing is, I'm full of righteous indignation. Last year I was right, but she either wasn't aware of the holiday (which I find difficult to believe) or walks around with a chip on her shoulder. I vote for number two. She was offended, and we both ended up getting upset. I'm just a year late. Living in this city, I get so tired of the constant reminders of racism. We're a mess. But to make an innocent remark that's immediately misunderstood just gets my goat. And here it is, a year later and I'm freshly hacked off. My problem, sure, but it just gets so old.

Beginning the day

We're to expect some rainy, windy weather today. It's not fretting me, but the weathermen would prefer that it did. They sure do get excited about using heavy adjectives, you know? Devastating, torrential, catastrophic....you name it, they use it. Everything's a big deal. Well, I don't think so! While I don't doubt that the weather might get dicey, I'd rather not make too much of an issue of it until it gets here.

Just one outing today, and that includes buying clothes soap. Just going to trot down to that friendly Family Dollar this morning and get that. Then home to do school, make chocolate chip cookies and have either potato soup (postponed from yesterday) or split pea. Neither thrilling, but with yeast in the house, and plenty of flour, might make some fresh bread. That'd liven things up, I think.

With me being online less, I've been more inclined to keep the house up. Have a pretty good housecleaning record for the past little bit. Love getting it all spiffed up in the evening, so when I make my tea in the morning, the sink is empty and the living room is straight. Just makes my heart glad. Clutter makes me tetchy, and for a long time, I wasn't aware of what was bothering me. While we never get all things clean---the bedrooms are full UP!---the main living areas make me smile!

Now, time to get off this thing. :)

(painting by stephen darbishire)

Heavy reading

Have been making a short list of books for the kids to read before school lets out. We're into Cyrano de Bergerac now, and since I've always loved plays anyway, it's a treat. Cyrano is so likable. Our Town is next on the list, and it might take some time to get through, but figured we were on a roll with reading plays.

Got 1984 and Brave New World yesterday, at the library, but don't think we'll be reading them as a group. Sometimes a book is more earthy than I intend to inflict on our kids, and these fit that description. I dunno. When I was in high school (private) and in college (not-private), we read stuff I'd not be keen on having in the house. Just because it's popular, doesn't make it necessary. Catcher in the Rye is one, and I'm sure I could make the list longer. Call me over-cautious. I don't care.

The thing is, both the books I've mentioned are frighteningly spot on as far as the thinking of the world is going. (This is amazing to me especially since one was published in the early '30's and the other one in 1950.) They couldn't have known that...but with Brave New World's dealing in reproduction (test tube sorts), well, we're almost there. The buzz is that folks want to select the sex and characteristics of their babies. Yuck. And as far as 1984 goes, yes, people do seem to want to be controlled by the government. The 'tell me what to do and I'll do it' mentality is more and more prevalent. And, if a person's doing what they're told, they're not held responsible for the consequences, are they? Huh!

Must seek out some light reading for the day. This heavy stuff makes me frown. :) I must be a sucker for punishment. Have put myself on a news blackout, but still seem to need the stimulation of hot topics. Brother.

Now, as to my current Internet consumption, as mentioned on Sunday---my time online is down, and I'm trying to focus on what I really want to do/see and not what just splashes in front of me. Much better!