Twenties: Graduated from college with an Interior Design degree, met my husband a month after graduation---married within 9 months time, worked for a commercial Interior Design firm, quit job before children came, had two babies, moved four times, once out-of-town and back.
Thirties: Bought our house (where we still live), had five more babies (3 born at home), began to have migraines, began writing seriously and sending things to publishers (no takers, but overall, a good experience), was involved in a very active online counted cross-stitch group, also member of a budding (now very popular and successful) Classical homeschooling list.
Forties: Had a miscarriage as a result of a car accident involving a drunk driver while we were out of town---that event changed my mental state forever, had one more baby (at home), felt the pinch of so many small children along with homeschooling, overwhelmed at 'oftentimes' low income, realized that I suffer from mild depression, began moderately popular email list directed at young mothers-at-home, eventually left both stitching and homeschooling groups, also closed my own email list after about 6+ years of posting.
Fifties: Closed companion website to email list, became confirmed in Anglican Church, began herbal studies, got a tattoo, and am feeling more comfortable in my own skin. Learning to say no to what isn't really mine to say yes to, making decisions based more on what I believe/think than others.
Now, this year, things seem to be falling into place, or maybe I'm finally growing up. In looking over the above writing, my fifties seem to be the best of the lot. Funny that. About the finances, I'm realizing at the ripe old age of 54 that the Lord has His way whether I involve myself or not. He really is in charge. I can kick and scream and fuss all I want, but He is Sovereign. Along with that it seems my mom's stroke has helped me put life into more perspective. Living with scarce funds is hard. A stroke is REALLY hard. What for years had my knickers in a twist isn't so difficult to stomach anymore. Well, I say that today. Who knows what I'll think tomorrow or next week.
Anyway, I guess my fifties are about possibly getting my ducks in a row. The days of extreme vanity are, pretty much, over. I'm not so concerned with what folks think. More realistic about how I look and who I really am. I'm just regular. Okay, I'm unique in my husband's and the Lord's eyes, but fame won't be my calling card, and being satisfied with my home and family is enough. In that way I'm regular.
And now I'm more into self-care. To focus on slowing down, respecting the reality of growing older, and relishing the days. It really is passing so quickly, and maybe the harsh truth of my mom's recovery has been a wake-up call. We really do run around all the time, thinking we have to accomplish so much, driving our kids to the extreme, and setting a bad example. Time to quit, take note of what does and doesn't need doing and really live. Easier said than done, yes?
