Perspective

~pugs and chickens (about the same size!)

The three youngest went to a funeral at church this morning with me.  I sang in the choir and they sat with friends.  Sweet service, and the message our priest gave was about brokenness.  About how when life is messed up, that's the way it's supposed to be.  Life isn't always tidy---or something to that effect.  I found that hugely comforting.

Life has indeed been messy for a long time, especially the past year.  Partly because of hard-heartedness, but sometimes because I guess that's the way the Lord had it planned.  His will isn't always full of 'ducks in a row.'

When we were in the Parish Hall getting the food ready for the luncheon to be held after the burial, I got a call from my first cousin telling me that her dad had died---my mom's brother-in-law, my sweet uncle who's been in the hospital for several weeks.  I went and saw him there about a month ago, he stayed asleep the whole time and I knew then that'd be the last time I saw him alive.  News of his death was, pretty much, the last straw.  I had to bear up because we were busy, but it was like I couldn't take one more thing.  I was full up.

Then tonight at the store, we picked up a few things for the rest of the weekend.  It's a tad confusing to buy my mom's groceries as well, not being on the right wavelength of that yet, but we make it alright.  Anyway, I've been all fretful about stuff and out of the blue Gary says, "You know, life is tough, but it's good."

I loved that he said that.  It's okay to acknowledge that it's hard, doesn't make sense and causes us to suffer, but it's also good to admit that it's a blessing.  I tend to forget that part.