My girls are finally having to deal with the nonsense their brothers have put them through these past few months. They'd not reached that place yet. Our youngest, who's newly thirteen, is one who will always say she's fine, even when she's not. She stuffs things down. Our middle girl, who's sixteen, doesn't hide it so well. For example, when oldest son came by on Father's Day, she'd just woken up from a nap, walked right past him where he was in the living room, and didn't even acknowledge his presence. I call that audacious, and I didn't say a word. I won't stand in the way of how these girls relate to their brothers. I won't scold or say a word. They have to get to a place where they can deal, and seems today was that day. Know this, though. None of the girls are aware of what his girlfriend does for a living. They don't need that in their heads, and the youngest ones wouldn't understand anyway. The girls are just hacked that he's living in sin. Yeah, that's enough for their sweet minds to get around.
Middle daughter said she felt let down by those she felt she could count on and trust (meaning the boys). Abandoned. She and I just cried, her openly, me trying to hide it from her. I cry all the time, which they're used to, but don't want to appear fragile when I need to be the strong one. She'd written a very sweet letter to the least one telling her they were best friends and how she wanted to 'be there' for her. It was awesome in its tenderness.
Felt good to hear them being open. I told her it's been healing for me to get mad on paper, and middle daughter said she'd done that, but hadn't felt a release from it. Dang those boys. They've said what they're doing isn't hurting anyone. They don't have a clue.
Was reading Matthew 13:24-30, the Parable of the Weeds, and it's our family. Not a pleasant ending, but it's so apropos.
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Jesus told them another parable: "The kingdom of heaven is like a man who sowed good seed in his field. But while everyone was sleeping, his enemy came and sowed weeds among the wheat, and went away. When the wheat sprouted and formed heads, then the weeds also appeared. The owner's servants came to him and said, 'Sir, didn't you sow good seed in your field? Where then did the weeds come from?'
'An enemy did this,' he replied.
The servants asked him, 'Do you want us to go and pull them up?'
'No,' he answered, 'because while you are pulling the weeds, you may uproot the wheat with them. Let both grow together until the harvest. At that time I will tell the harvesters: First collect the weeds and tie them into bundles to be burned; then gather the wheat and bring it into my barn.'"
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As my husband says repeatedly, we have to keep our tent clean. And even tonight after dinner he said he so much enjoys our home now. No animosity or struggles. The Spirit is clearly present and we try to stay on top of it. Can't let our guard down, but try to stay on top of what's in our children's heads. You have to.
And I'm reading a review book by Nancy Ortberg called Seeing in the Dark, and it's exactly what I need today and everyday lately. In dark days God is so present, even more so than in the joys---that's the message. It's a book of hope. And in contrast, I reviewed a book by her husband awhile back. Not keen on him, but she is a comfort. You just never know. :)
