Mothering...and daughtering. Full-time jobs that wear a person out.
My mom is in an odd mental place just now. Has called a halt to the kids coming to her house (bi-weekly since we got back to school in September), but she won't elaborate. Says she doesn't want to do the regular grandmother thing anymore. But says she does want to see them every once in awhile. Huh. When I shared this with the kids, middle daughter cried, and a couple of them looked hurt. You might think she's just tired, but really, the kids do so much for her around the house and ease her responsibilities, so that's not the reason. I know this for sure. Plus, she lives alone and really seems boosted up with the company. Good luck with me getting the truth out of her. My extended family ain't too swift in stating deep emotions. I was raised to play the silent card, but fortunately married a man who won't tolerate that option. Pouting and sulking not allowed. The frustrating part is that if/when I ask her if she's okay, especially in regards to this situation, she'll always play like everything's fine. We've become dab hands at stuffing down irritations and truth. And I don't mean to sound harsh, but there really is more going on that meets the eye. Just doesn't bear going into here.
And third son is moving out soon. He's excited, and Gary and I are happy for him, but feeling twinges at our first child leaving the nest. We've become content with all of our offspring living here. Our story isn't a new one, but just new for us. I told this son to keep his house key, not to knock when he comes back, and know that he can always move back in if situations warrant that.
I know of someone whose husband required all their kids to move out either at, or near, their 18th birthdays (not anyone who reads this blog, though). I call that mean and unfair. All children aren't prepared by then to be independent. We might go to the extreme with allowing our children to stay, at least in some folks' minds, but the way I see it, it's like breastfeeding. They'll move on eventually. They just do.
