In this New Year, I'm not going to pressure myself with things I think I *ought* to do, rather will focus on taking care of myself in a more genuine way. For example: would love to lose weight, but won't load myself with guilt if it doesn't happen. Told my husband the other night that 2010 had been a hard year, and he said that I say that every year. That prompted me to tell him that he's not supposed to know me well enough to make comments like that. He raised his bushy eyebrows at me for that remark. Still, I'd rather remain a tiny bit mysterious, just in case. Seems I'm not doing too swift a job in that department, does it?
Anyway, mentioned to oldest daughter today that I feel like I'm always on alert, watching and listening for details of everything that goes on around here. I listen to hear if the dryer is run too long, or if the tub drips overmuch, also am always fretting if the dogs annoy anyone--especially when the frustration of moving one more dog/child gate gets on anyone's nerves. See, I've taken on the job of insuring everyone's happiness and contentment---except my own.
I see a trend here, and this year hope to alter it. I want to move on up the list of my own importance. Sure, I'll take care of them, but have left myself off by the side of the road way too much. And it's not that I'm a doormat. They respect me around here, but I've allowed myself to be a minor note. And I'm tired of being sad about that.
Now just as a happy for you, go listen to Adam Watts' 'When Everything Else is Gone', and tell me if the introduction reminds you of the Beatles. And wanted to add that oldest daughter rented a movie on Amazon called 'The Lightkeepers' and I watched it yesterday and totally loved it. The reviews are poor, but she and I both thought it was very sweet. Maybe folks are so jaded by high action and convoluted plots that they can't appreciate simple acting and a good old-fashioned story. Never mind them. It was a treat.
